Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Just a few observations from the day...

First observation: my kitchen is cleaner that it has ever been on a regular basis...all thanks to Sandy and the fact that she comes behind like my own personal dustbuster. And how sweet it is! I remember a day when it would bug me that she would clean up faster than I could dirty anything up...like I would get up from the table to answer the phone or something and by the time I got back my plate would already be washed clean and in the drying rack. Now I am anything but bugged. I am overjoyed. Like tonight I was bathing all the girls and came out of the bathroom to find the table wiped clean (trust me - I hate that job because of all of the smashed food residue after every meal), the floor picked up, the babies' room straight. All in a matter of a 10 minutes.

And I am dead serious that this just happened tonight: I walked into my room to go to bed and she was heading to the shower. I came back out to get on the computer...a mere 2 minutes later and all the pillows had been fluffed and straightened on the couch, the blankets folded, and not a trace of a utensil or dish anywhere to be seen in my kitchen. Amazing. Truly amazing. It is so unlike me and I love every minute of it.

She starts back to work tomorrow, which I'm sure she's excited to do. Frankly I've been thinking of asking her if I could just go back to work and she could raise the kids! Just kidding...though if we were independently wealthy I would have her quit her job and continue her dustbusting until the end of time.

My second observation of the day is one that I've made before but never posted until now. I got to go to Publix by myself today (quite a delight...and that's not a joke) and I am always trying to find the fastest check out line so that I can, well, check out. I am there all the time so I know which cashiers are quick and which ones are like the Target lady on SNL. I know which baggers are slow and which ones will give me double paper bags. In the past I've always chosen the shortest line which inevitably seems to take the longest time. It's just a sort of an anti-gift I have. Anyway, I think I've finally figured out the secret to getting out of there quickly. Picture this: you're in line to check out and realize that you've chosen poorly so you begin to peruse the tops of the heads of the people in other lines, wondering if their carts are full, partially full, or pretty empty. You don't want to get out of your lane and check it out, though, because what if you're wrong and end up in an even longer line than the one in which you presently find yourself. Ready for the solution??? Search for the line with the most men in it. You know why? Because without fail, men have only a few items and the reason is that they work solely off of a LIST. That's right, people. Just take notice the next time you're checking out. Men are always in the express lane because they NEVER have more than ten items. And if they're in another lane then that just means they have eleven items. They go into the store, they get whatever they need to make it through the rest of that day, and they're outta there...instead of what women buy which is whole milk for the babies, 1% for the rest of the family, rice krispy treat makings for her daughter's class, bag salad, snack packs for lunch boxes, a card for your great great aunt's birthday, enough food to feed a family for an entire week, and every possible BOGO item offered. Men just go in there and get it done. Women go in there and just get everything. Why? Because one of two things happens to women in a grocery store:

1. She is in there with her children and she just throws things into her cart that she thinks they need while her kids fuss, fight, pull over displays, crumble cookies, etc. Her brain is mush so she just grabs everything in stead of discriminating.
2. She has come to the store by herself and is so excited about it that she slowly and deliberately travels every aisle, taking time to get what she needs, as well as looking around at what the store has to offer. "I never knew they carried four different sizes of pooper scoopers!". Amazing.

So bottom line of today is that I am thankful Sandy is here. It has given me time to be woman number two above and leisurely peruse the carefully stocked shelves of my local Publix, all the while knowing that when I get home the kids will be alive and well and, most importantly, I can see actual countertop space in my kitchen.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I miss her already! Susan